It’s Hard But it’s Holy
It’s Hard, But It’s Holy: Why Your Struggle Is Actually a Sign You’re on the Right Track
Let’s be honest for a second, Scottsdale. We live in a beautiful place. The sun is shining (most of the time), the restaurants are incredible—shout out to anyone who loves a good steak from Dominick’s or even a casual Tuesday at True Food—and from the outside, life can look pretty polished.
But if we peel back the layers of the perfect zip code and the carefully curated Instagram feeds, a lot of us are walking through seasons that just feel… hard.
Maybe you’re raising a young family and you’re exhausted. Maybe you’re trying to run a business with integrity in a cutthroat market. Maybe you’re battling a private struggle that nobody knows about. When we hit these walls, our default reaction is often, "I must be doing something wrong. If God was with me, this would be easy."
But what if the struggle isn’t a sign of God’s absence? What if it’s actually proof of His process?
Recently at Impact Church, we dove deep into a message titled "It's Hard, But It's Holy." It was a wake-up call for anyone who feels like giving up. We unpacked the reality that following Jesus isn't about comfort food; sometimes, it's about eating your vegetables. It’s about building spiritual muscle.
If you’ve been feeling resistance in your life, this is for you. Let’s break down why living a life set apart is the hardest—and best—thing you will ever do.
The Problem with "Normal" in a Scottsdale World
We all have pet peeves, right? Loud chewers (we love you, but please stop), negative people who suck the vibe out of the room, or maybe the "One-Upper."
You know the One-Upper. That’s the person who is never content with where they are. You tell them you went on a nice road trip to Newport, and they tell you they just got back from a month in Bali on a private jet. You tell them you had a great steak, and they ask if you’ve been to the most expensive spot in town.
The One-Upper is obsessed with different. They want a different car, a different house, a different status.
As Christians, we often fall into a spiritual version of this One-Upper mentality. We want a different job, a different spouse, a different bank account balance. We want everything around us to change, except for the one thing that actually matters: our character.
We settle for being "normal."
But here is the hard truth: Normal isn't working.
Normal in our culture today is compromise.
Normal is "if I feel it, I do it."
Normal is anxiety, broken relationships, and shallow living.
Jesus didn’t call us to be normal. He called us to be Holy. To be "set apart." If you are a follower of Jesus, you are a citizen of Heaven living in the 480 area code. You are meant to look different. You are meant to sound different.
Jesus put it this way in Matthew 7:13-14:
"Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few."
Did you catch that? The way to life is hard. If your walk with God feels difficult right now, don't panic. You’re likely walking through the narrow gate.
The Misconception of Holiness
Somewhere along the way, the church got scared of the word "Holiness." We thought it meant being judgmental, religious, or wearing distinct clothes. We traded holiness for a watered-down gospel that only focuses on "God is my friend."
And yes, God is your friend. He is loving. But the very first way God describes Himself in Scripture is Holy.
Holiness literally means to "cut" or to "separate." It means being uncommon.
The opposite of holiness isn't just sin; the opposite of holiness is common.
If you want to live a life of purpose, you cannot live a common life. You have to be willing to be misunderstood. You have to be willing to go through the fire. We see this perfectly illustrated in the life of Joseph in the Old Testament (Genesis 37). Joseph had a God-given dream, but between the dream and the destiny, he had to go through hell.
If you are walking through a valley right now, you are facing the same three tests that Joseph faced. These tests are hard, but they are making you holy.
1. The Test of Opposition
Joseph had a dream that he would be a leader, that he would have influence. He shared that dream with his family, and what happened? His brothers hated him. They threw him in a pit and sold him into slavery.
Talk about opposition.
Here is a spiritual principle we need to get in our spirits: Everything God calls you to do will be resisted by the enemy.
If you decide to get your finances right and tithe, watch the car break down the next day.
If you decide to forgive that family member, watch them say something rude to you the next morning.
If you decide to go all-in at church, watch your work schedule get crazy.
When we face opposition, we usually think, "I must have missed God." No! If you aren't facing resistance, you might be going in the same direction as the enemy. The resistance is proof that you are moving forward against the current of the world.
Joseph faced opposition from family. He faced opposition from injustice (he was thrown in prison for a crime he didn't commit). He faced the opposition of being misunderstood.
Have you ever been misunderstood? You try to obey God, and people think you’re crazy.
Maybe you turned down a promotion because it would cost you your time with your family, and your coworkers think you’re insane.
Maybe you broke up with that person because you knew they weren't good for your spiritual walk, and your friends think you're being too picky.
You do not have to be understood to be obedient.
Let Jesus defend your reputation. You just keep walking through the narrow gate. It’s hard, but it’s holy.
2. The Test of Obscurity
We live in a world where everything is posted, shared, and liked. If it didn't happen on social media, did it even happen? We are obsessed with being seen.
But Joseph spent years in obscurity. He was hidden in a pit. Hidden in Potiphar's house. Hidden in a prison cell.
We often view obscurity as punishment. "God, why aren't you using me? Why am I stuck in this job? Why am I still single?"
God isn't punishing you; He is preparing you.
Think about it like parenting. If you have a five-year-old, you don't let them run across Scottsdale Road by themselves. You hold their hand. You restrict them. Why? Because you are protecting them from something they aren't ready to handle yet.
God will often hide you to protect you. He knows that if He gave you the platform, the money, or the relationship right now, your character wouldn't be able to sustain it. You would crush under the weight of the blessing.
So, He hides you. He teaches you faithfulness in the dark. He teaches you to serve when no one is clapping.
What is hidden is holy.
That season of changing diapers and feeling like you’ve lost your identity? It’s holy.
That season of grinding at work with no recognition? It’s holy.
That season of singleness where you are learning to be whole in Christ? It’s holy.
A great prayer to pray is: "God, don't let my platform get greater than my character." Embrace the obscurity. He sees you, even when no one else does.
3. The Test of Obedience
Finally, Joseph passed the test of obedience. Not just the big, cinematic obedience of saving Egypt from famine, but the daily, boring, gritty obedience.
He didn't sleep with Potiphar's wife when he could have.
He served the cupbearer in prison when he didn't have to.
He kept a good attitude when he had every right to be bitter.
Small obedience leads to big breakthrough.
We all want the "burning bush" moment. We want God to write our destiny in the sky. But God usually speaks in a whisper, asking for a small "yes."
"Yes, I'll apologize first."
"Yes, I'll sign up to serve on the Dream Team."
"Yes, I'll be honest about my struggle."
Let’s get vulnerable for a moment. Pastoral leadership isn't about pretending to be perfect. Our youth pastor, Ryan, shared a powerful part of his testimony regarding this test of obedience. He shared that before entering ministry, he battled a secret addiction to pornography for nearly a decade. He was bound by shame, thinking, "I can't tell anyone. I'm a Christian. I'm called to ministry."
But the Holy Spirit prompted a small act of obedience: Confess.
"Tell someone."
That one small "yes" to walk into a mentor's office and confess his sin didn't just bring forgiveness; it brought healing. As James 5:16 says, "Confess your sins to one another so that you will be healed."
That obedience opened the door to freedom. Then came the next yes. And the next. Years later, that chain of small yeses led him to his wife, to ministry, and eventually to us here at Impact Church in Scottsdale.
You cannot have the "palace" ending of Joseph's life without the "prison" obedience of Joseph's life.
Your Struggle Has a Purpose
If you are reading this today and you feel like you are in the fight of your life, I want to encourage you: Do not quit.
The enemy wants you to believe that the struggle means you’re failing.
The truth is, the struggle means you are following.
It’s hard to raise a family in a godly way today.
It’s hard to stay pure in a culture that sells sex.
It’s hard to be generous when inflation is up.
It’s hard to forgive when you’ve been betrayed.
It’s hard, but it’s Holy.
God is doing something in you that is far more valuable than comfort. He is forging a character that can carry His glory. He is setting you apart. He is making you distinct.
So, stop trying to be normal. Normal leads to destruction. Embrace the narrow gate. Embrace the set-apart life.
What’s Your Next Step?
Maybe you've been reading this and realized you've been drifting toward the "wide gate." You've been trying to blend in with the culture rather than standing out for the Kingdom. Not because there's anything wrong with the local culture — but because the pace, the pressure, the constant striving to keep up can quietly pull any of us off course. It's not a Scottsdale problem. It's a human one.
Today is a great day to pivot.
Identify the Opposition: Where are you feeling resistance? Stop seeing it as a bad thing and start seeing it as a confirmation that you need to press in.
Embrace the Obscurity: If you feel hidden, ask God, "What are you trying to teach me right now that I can't learn in the spotlight?"
Do the Next Small Thing: What is the one small act of obedience God is asking for? Is it to join a small group? Is it to text that friend and forgive them? Is it to confess a struggle to a safe person?
Don't wait for the feelings to follow. Obedience comes first; the feelings (and the breakthrough) come later.
We are cheering for you, Impact Church. We believe that the best is yet to come, not because life is going to get easier, but because God is making us stronger.
Frequently Asked Questions
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Based on the Bible, being holy doesn't mean you are perfect or better than anyone else. In the original language, "holy" simply means to "cut" or be "set apart." It means choosing not to be "common." In a place like Scottsdale, living holy might look like choosing integrity over easy money, or choosing forgiveness over holding a grudge. It is about looking different than the culture around you.
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If you feel resistance, it’s often proof that you are moving in the right direction. In Matthew 7, Jesus describes the path to life as the "narrow gate" which is hard and found by few. Struggle isn't always a sign of God's absence; often, it is a sign of His preparation. Just like Joseph in the Bible, God often uses difficulty to prepare our character for our calling.
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The first step is realizing that your battle isn't against people (flesh and blood), but is spiritual. When you face opposition—whether it’s misunderstanding from family or hurdles at work—don’t quit. Lean into God’s presence. Opposition is often a test of your obedience. Keep saying "yes" to God in the small things, and let Him defend your reputation.
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God often hides His people before He uses them. We see this in the life of Joseph, Moses, and even Jesus. Obscurity is not punishment; it is protection. God "hides" us to prepare our character so that we don't get crushed by the weight of our future platform or blessing. Use your waiting season to deepen your intimacy with God.
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The Bible tells us in James 5:16 to "confess your sins to one another so that you may be healed." We find forgiveness from God, but we often find healing through community and accountability. If you are struggling, the bravest thing you can do is bring it into the light. You can’t conquer what you refuse to confront.
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