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The Cost of Discipleship: What Following Jesus Requires
The cost of discipleship is not what most people signed up for. Following Jesus means He leads and you don't, and that single reality changes everything about how you live, decide, and surrender. In Luke 9:23-26, Jesus lays out three honest demands that define what it means to follow Jesus for real.
Most people have no problem with the idea of Jesus. The miracles, the grace, the forgiveness — that version of faith fits nicely on a t-shirt. But then Jesus turns to the crowd and says something that changes the energy in the room entirely. He doesn't say admire me. He doesn't say agree with me. He says: follow me. And following is a different thing altogether.
For decades, a version of Christianity has been taught that focuses almost entirely on what Jesus can do for you: the healing, the blessing, the protection. And those things are real. But Jesus didn't stop there. In Luke 9, before He ever carries His own cross to save the world, He looks at the crowd and says if you want to walk with me, you will need to carry one too. That is the cost of discipleship, and it is the most important thing many people have never heard clearly.
Deny Yourself Take Up Cross: The Demand That Flips Everything
The phrase "deny yourself, take up your cross" sits at the center of Luke 9:23, and it may be the most offensive sentence in modern culture. The world's message runs exactly opposite: follow your heart, trust your feelings, live your truth, do what makes you happy. Jesus steps into the middle of all that noise and says something completely different.
When Jesus said "deny yourself," He wasn't calling anyone to self-hatred. He was calling them to self-surrender. There is a massive difference between the two. Self-hatred says you are worthless. Self-surrender says you are not the highest authority in your own life anymore. The ego that wants control, the pride that refuses correction, the impulse that says I know better than God: that is what has to be handed over. Deny yourself, take up cross is Jesus's shorthand for stop treating your own desires like they are sacred.
Galatians 2:20 makes the outcome clear: "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but it is Christ who lives within me." This is not theoretical language; it is a description of a life that has been fundamentally reoriented. Colossians 3:5 adds the specific application: put to death what is earthly in you. He didn't say manage it. He didn't say slowly phase it out. He said put it to death.
Denying yourself and taking up your cross applies to the habit you've normalized, the relationship you know is wrong, the bitterness you keep nursing, and the pride that won't bend. None of those things get a renovation. They get a crucifixion.
One honest step: Identify one desire or habit you've been treating as untouchable. You don't have to fix it today. Just stop pretending it doesn't exist.
Dying to Self Meaning: What Happens When You Stop Running From the Cross
The cross was not jewelry in the first century. It was Rome's instrument of capital punishment: a slow, public, agonizing execution. Men were flogged until their backs were ribbons of flesh, then forced to drag a wooden beam through the streets while crowds mocked them. At the execution site, iron spikes were hammered through wrists and feet, and every breath required pushing up on torn hands and nail-pierced feet just to inhale.
That is what Jesus was referring to when He said take up your cross. The dying to self meaning is not metaphorical discomfort. It is the execution of the old self. Romans 6:6 says "our old self was crucified with him so that the body ruled by sin might be done away with." Galatians 5:24 adds that those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. The dying to self meaning, in plain language, is this: your old nature doesn't get rehabbed. It gets crucified.
The anger you keep excusing gets crucified. The lust you keep entertaining gets crucified. The bitterness you keep nursing gets crucified. The insecurity driving every decision gets crucified. And then, and this is what makes the whole thing bearable, Jesus says daily. Not a one-time event you survive and move past. He knew His followers would get back off the cross the moment it got inconvenient, so He said every morning, the same decision: today I carry this instead of my old self.
The dying to self meaning is not about becoming small. It is about letting something truer live in the space the old self used to occupy.
One honest step: Start tomorrow morning with one sentence out loud: "Today I follow you, not me." That's it. One day at a time.
How to Stop Making Excuses and Follow Jesus With Your Whole Life
There will always be a "but first." That is not pessimism; it is Jesus's own observation. In Luke 9:57-62, He encounters three different people on the road. Each one says some version of the same thing: I'll follow you, Lord, but first. First let me bury my father. First let me say goodbye to my family. And Jesus responds in a way that is jarring. He doesn't comfort them. He calls them on it.
"No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God." When you are learning how to stop making excuses and follow Jesus, the first thing to understand is that the excuses will never run out. There will always be another responsibility, another relationship, another season that feels like the wrong time. The person who keeps saying "I'll commit later" is not someone waiting for the right moment; they are someone who has quietly made the excuse their god.
How to stop making excuses and follow Jesus begins with naming the specific thing sitting between you and full surrender. Maybe it's a business being built without God. Maybe it's a relationship pulling in the wrong direction. Maybe it's a lifestyle that's more comfortable than it is honest. Whatever it is, it has a name. And the moment you name it, it loses some of its power.
Jesus didn't tell people to follow Him when their schedules opened up. He said follow me: present tense, right now, whatever it costs. Knowing how to stop making excuses and follow Jesus is not a matter of willpower. It is a matter of deciding that the excuse is not more important than the one calling you forward.
One honest step: Write down your "but first," the specific thing you keep putting in front of God. You don't need to fix it today. Just be honest enough to see it clearly.
What Luke 9 Says About the Three Costs of True Discipleship
Luke 9:23 reads: "Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me." Three demands, each one a decision. Here is what each of them actually requires:
1. No Excuses
The demand: Follow Jesus now, not when it's convenient.
The cost: Every "but first" that lives between you and full surrender has to go, whether it's a career, a relationship, a lifestyle, or a timeline you've set for yourself.
2. Deny Yourself
The demand: Stop treating your own desires, impulses, and emotions as the highest authority in your life.
The cost: The ego, the pride that refuses correction, and the habits you've protected all have to be handed over. Not improved. Surrendered.
3. Take Up Your Cross Daily
The demand: Put to death what is earthly in you, every single day.
The cost: Your old nature doesn't get a second chance to manage things better. It gets crucified. And then the next morning, the same choice is made again.
The prosperity gospel, the idea that faith is mostly about what Jesus does for you, has had a decades-long run. But it leaves people empty because it is only half the story. Yes, Jesus came to save. But in Luke 9, He also told us the price upfront, before He ever asked anyone to follow.
You Don't Have to Carry This Alone
There is something hard about sitting with the gap between the life you're living and the life you sense you were made for. That tension is real, and it doesn't go away on its own. If you're somewhere in the greater Phoenix area — from North Scottsdale to Chandler, Tempe to Gilbert, Paradise Valley to the broader Maricopa County region — Impact Church in Scottsdale is a community where that weight is taken seriously. You don't need a perfect background or a polished faith. You just need to show up.
The Road to the Cross Is the Only Road That Leads Somewhere Real
Following Jesus isn't the comfortable path, but it is the right one. No excuses, deny yourself, take up your cross daily: three starting points Jesus gave us in Luke 9, each one a decision you make again every morning. The old self doesn't get renovated. It gets crucified. And what gets to live in its place is something no amount of self-improvement could ever build.
If you want to bring this to God and don't know where to start, submit a prayer request here. Our team reads every one and prays over each personally. And if you're ready to experience Impact Church in person, plan your visit below and come see what this community is about.
Frequently Asked Questions
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Taking up your cross daily means choosing, every morning, to put your old self to death rather than letting it lead. Jesus used the image of the cross because His audience knew exactly what it meant: public humiliation, suffering, and execution. It is not a season of difficulty that eventually ends. It is a daily surrender to what Jesus says over what the flesh wants.
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Denying yourself for Christ begins with recognizing that your desires, impulses, and emotions are not the highest authority in your life anymore. It is not self-hatred; it is self-surrender. Galatians 2:20 describes the result as Christ living in you rather than you living for yourself. Practically, it means naming the specific habits, relationships, or attitudes you have been protecting and bringing them under God's authority rather than your own.
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Because Jesus isn't offering self-improvement; He's offering a completely new life. That new life requires the death of the old one. The cost is high because what's on the table is enormous: your entire way of living in exchange for something that actually lasts. Jesus was honest about this upfront, which is why He said it to a crowd of curious onlookers rather than softening the message.
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Believing in Jesus means accepting that He is who He says He is. Following Jesus means going where He goes, loving the way He loves, giving the way He gives, and surrendering your own plans to His direction. A lot of people hold the belief without making the move. Luke 9:23 makes clear that discipleship requires active, daily decision, not a one-time mental agreement.
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True discipleship looks like a life consistently reoriented toward Jesus's priorities rather than your own. It means getting into Scripture and community regularly, not just in difficult seasons. It means being willing to be corrected by God's word even when it is uncomfortable. And it means doing the daily work of putting to death the habits and attitudes that pull you away from the life God has for you.
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